Ambition is a funny thing. Sometimes when my own brand of ambition gets to be too much–when yet another marketing email about how to take my business to the next level/become a grand poobah empire of my very own hits my inbox, when I glance at my 5 year plan and it makes me weep with weariness, instead of tingle with excitement, when even the smallest of tasks feel like too much for me–

I like to find solace in the world of online homemaking. There is something so comforting, so (my kind of) ambition-lessness in the world of home lifestyle blogs. It’s all women who not only bathe regularly, they have clean homes, and children with names like Aidan and Quinn, who are “simply” dedicated to making their homes and children and communities beautiful, lovely, clean, better places. I just casually surf through their sunnily lit DIY tablescapes that would fit right in with an issue of Martha Stewart Living until I can feel the death grip of my wants and desires and plans and ambitions loosen from around my neck a little.

I’m not saying these women are ambition-less. I understand they have ambition, too, and their own milieu of course has its own set of standards that are sysphian. One of the things I coach clients on is that very image of doing it all and doing it perfectly that we use to drive ourselves caray-zay. I’m sure they feel weary, not up the task, lesser-than, and like every other mommy blogger has it figured out, too. It’s just such a relief to peek into a world where there is no danger of me creating stories of lack there. I don’t have a home, I don’t have two cute children (I don’t have any children), I don’t possess the ability (or the expectation or the inclination) that I need to come up with 50-75 original, handmade gift items for everyone on my list.

I am released from the task of trying to figure out where I fit in, what my mark is to make, where I need to direct my energy. It is not possible for me, at this point in my life, to read these blogs and see anything but a group of lovely humans trying to make things lovelier for there rest of us.

I guess that’s what it’s about–I am able to happily browse through the catalogue of their dreams, their creations, their struggles, because I can easily see the beauty there–it’s everywhere and I’m not scared that these women having something beautiful means I can’t. I don’t get caught up in my what it means for my own abilities to similarly deliver.

Now imagine that I’m able to transfer that perspective into my own milieu–if I see every single thing that anyone in the world of healing, art, coaching, and entrepreneurship is doing not as another measure that I have to try to live up to or even evaluate as relevant to me or not. What if instead, I just look and say, “oh what a lovely group of humans trying to make things lovelier for the rest of us.” And let them do it. And know that I’m part of that, just as I am right this minute (/hat tip to Bridget Jones). Without another another degree or training program, without permission from an authority, without approval from the experts.

You are, too. Whatever field you’re in, it’s easy to get caught up in the ambitions particular to that field, but if you take a step back, and look at it, you can see those ambitions are merely expressions of a basic desire to be better, to do better, and that can be enough for now. Let the deathgrip loosen a little.